Really blogger, you just do not compete well against Tumblr~ I mean I can't sit here on blogger and reblog pictures and all that fun stuff. Anyways, I start my new job on Friday. FINALLY!! Gotta start planning all of my summer trips, sooo many of them are about to the planned. Okay this isn't fun so I'm going back to tumblr. http://heytheremeranda.tumblr.com Yeaaaah.

Regrets.

Its weird how you really don't regret something until months after it has happened. When you feel this empty-ness inside and you sit there trying to figure out what it is from. And than you find some old pictures and all those memories you tried to forgot hits you like a ton of bricks. And than you sit there and beat yourself up over and over because you ruined something good, you hurt the ones you cared about, and you realize how much you have truly messed up. That's the moment that the regret sinks in and you wish you could go back in time and fix everything. Where you want to go back to that time when everything was happy and good, before you said those things and ruined what you now miss the most.

Those girls were my best friends, I felt like I could tell them anything in the world and they would not judge me for it. Some of the best times that I had these last few years were with them. Going to see musicals together, trips to the beach, singing loudly and horribly in my car with the windows down and a million other things. Those were the times, the times when I could say that I was honestly happy. And now comparing myself today to those times I realize how alone I really am. I try to shrug it off and seem like I'm fine having one person to hangout with but in reality I miss how things used to be. It felt like there was always someone there and someone to hangout with now. And you know how I am, put on a smile and pretend that nothing is wrong. I have no one to blame but myself for how things turned out. One fight between a person can lead to you losing everyone.

Looking back I would have done everything differently. Instead of just flat out getting into it with Steph I would have took a deep breathe and calmed down and pulled her aside and just talked to her. I wouldn't have ruined those friendships that I had. Maybe it's because I'm getting older and I'm realizing what I did was wrong, childish but most of all stupid. I never think before I speak, never realize what I say or do might hurt someome and now I'm realizing this all now. Now that it is too late. I guess the point of this is just to say that I regret this so much, I regret what I have done and I regret ruining those friendships that I had. I wish life had a rewind button but it doesn't. To anyone who is reading this, if I have hurt you or ruined our friendship I'm so sorry. I wish you knew how much our friendship meant to me and I want you to understand how sorry I really am. I know sorry doesn't always help things but I am sorry.

I am very quickly making my way through series three of Doctor Who which makes me a bit sad because that means very soon David Tennant will not be The Doctor any longer. I mean, yeah I'm excited to see Matt Smith (see above picture) as The Doctor but I just really really love me some David Tennant. But the good thing about almost being done with series three is that Martha won't be the companion anymore! And I will have Donna! Yay! But alas, I will be very sad to see David go and I heard his last few episodes are super sad.

I have an interview on Tuesday, I hope I get this job. If I do get it than it means that I can start saving money to move out. Well, I have two months to move out but that's an enitre different story. And if I stay at this job than maybe within the next year or so I can move to NYC! So hopefully all goes well Tuesday.

Nothing else to say really.

Who?

Doctor Who!

It's been a while since I have updates this and I have several good reasons. One being that I have started watching Doctor Who (done with the second season, almost done with the first and than back to re-watch the second season now that things will make sense) and I love it so so much. Ugggh, why did I not watch this sooner? Doctor Who is just so amazing and nerdy and I love everything about it.



Second I have been using Tumblr a lot. I think it's way more funner (?) than this boring old blogspot. Yeaaahh. And stuff you know. I haven't been up to much really. Just watching some Netflix and tumblring and all that good stuff. I just figured that I should update this. Yep.

Skype Fighters

DFTBA

Skype Fighter Love.

These Last Two Days...

Have been sooo amazing. On Friday John Green did a live blogtv show and afterwards we had an "after party" in the main room with the remaining people. Well a bunch of us got to talking and than we decided to move it to Skype because it would be easier. While on Skype we decided to call ourselves the Skype Fighters (after Nerdfighters). Well we wanted to go on cam and you really cant do a huge cam convo on Skype so we headed over to TinyChat (see picture on the right) and talked forever and ever. And Ive met some of the most awesome people ever. I think thats why I love our fandom so much because we can just start talking and we are instant friends. Anyways, the Skype Fighters now have a tumblr, facebook group, twitter, and youtube. And we have decided to have meeting on Fridays since we live in a bunch of different time zones.

So today (Saturday) the ones who were online went into TinyChat just to talk and Potter Cast was doing a live show to get people to donate to the HPA for the signed HP books byJK Rowling and one of the guests was Hank Green. So we ended up going into the LiveStream to watch and Hank Green gave a shout out to the Skype Fighters! dslgjlhjjlasej! It was so cooool. haha. But yeah anyways today we all hung out on Skype some more and confirmed our next Friday Skype Meeting. And there is talks about a possible Collab Channel with some of us.

It has just been so much fun and its great to meet all these awesome people that you have things in common with. You realize how loving and fun and awesome this community really is. And Im so glad Im apart of it and that Im able to have this experience and to have met all these awesome people. Hopefully things will go as planned and we will all keep talking and what not.

I think thats about it for now!

Blogtv...

Is sooo much fun. Haha. I love my friends, they are the weirdest, goofiest (is that even a word?) bunch of people. And even though we live miles away from one another its still fun when we are able to do silly things online.

And yeah.

I just felt like I needed to post something about the epicness that was blogtv tonight. Oh! And after it ended there was like 6 of us that stayed in there for two hours more just talking about everything and it was just so much fun. I love the Harry Potter fandom and the whole HP community so much, its such an awesome group of people and Im super glad that Im able to be a part of it.

And I think thats it for now cause its super late and Im sleepy and dont know what else to write.

I bought a thing of Droobles Best Blowing Gum (from the Harry Potter books) the other day. I was going to write my...experience of eating it. But than I realized that a video would be better! Haha. So, enjoy watching me eat(chew) some gum?

Also I'm in the process of getting my Photography blog in order. So stay tuned.

Today was awesome because I had some Harry Potter Gum.

This woman right here has inspired me so much and has had such a huge impact on my life.

Thank you J.K Rowling.

I went back and read some of my old blog posts and I came to realize that they are VERY angsty. I deleted a few and kept a few of the ones filled with angst. But I have decided to try and tone down the angst this year. Haha. And to fill this blog with fun stuff and pictures and quotes and maybe some poetry.You know, all that good stuff. But so far this year is off to a good start, all I need to do is hurry and find a job and than life will be even better. So here is to making this a much better and interesting blog. I also might start a blog just for my photography and if that happens I will let you know (with a link) so you can go and follow that one. But yeah be on the look out for the revamping of this blog and a possible new blog to be coming soon. Hope everyone is having a good year so far!

This Time...

In 2 months I hope to be down 30 pounds. In two months I will be 21. I know that I can reach losing 30 pounds in two months if I set my mind to it and thats whats Im going to do.

Okay is Wonderful.

2011 is off to an amazing start. On New Years I went to Melt Bar&Grill over in Cleveland with Bridget and her friend and sister and mom for her birthday dinner. That was pretty fun and the food was sooo good! There are so many sandwhiches that I want to try there so I know I will for sure be going back over there. And than yesterday I had a girls night with Brittany which was really nice because her and I haven't really hung out in a few years. So we are in the process of rekindling our 18 year friendship. Haha. We watched RENT, got 50 chicken nuggets from McDonalds, did face masks, ate Ben&Jerrys and took pictures. It was a really good night.

My fanfic is doing wonderful and has over 100 reviews which is just incredible and the people who comment it ae lovely and have nothing but nice things to say about it! Now only if I could find a job that would make this New Year even better. Haha. But I think thats it for now. Im going to go write some more for my story and possibly hang out with Sara today? Who knows but Im sure it will be a good day!

Oh! And Im going to see how many books I can read this year, I did it for 2009 and read over 70 books and than in 2010 I slacked off and hardly read anything. But Im going to start doing that this year and keep track of all that good stuff. The first book Im going to start reading is, The Hunger Games.

-Meranda

"I may lose everything but you never had it, had it. For once I never felt anything but now I feel sorry, sorry for you. You lost all man watch him writhe on the concrete, look at me boy. Youre pathetic and so weak, you are a fool and you will lose everything." -'I May Lose Everything' by Ministry of Magic.